How Motherhood Changed Me

Motherhood  is such a vague term. Is there such a thing as a perfect mother? Pardon me if I say this, but I don't think so. Moms are only human after all. We all have flaws, it's inevitable.

So, what really is motherhood? Some people describe their experiences on motherhood like it was some pleasant walk in the park, but I tell you, mine isn't. Mine is more like a baptism of fire. I've only been a wife for 3 years, my eldest is only 2 years old and my youngest child just turned 1, but, my parenting life has already been a whirlwind of experiences. 

How has motherhood changed me? I tell you, it wasn't easy. It was a 360 degrees turn, and I changed because I had to, not because I wanted to. Motherhood for me meant that I had to stop being the bitchy and whiny person that I am because I have to give way and listen to another person's whines. It meant that I had to give up some of my guilty pleasures. Things that I normally enjoy by myself  now had to be enjoyed with the whole family. Food that I enjoy eating by myself, like my favorite bar of chocolate, now had to be shared with my little gremlins. From being a spoiled-rotten kid, I had to learn the concept of  improvisation (if there's such a term) and resourcefulness the hard way. I used to hate cooking (because I'm a bad cook), but now I'm kinda enjoying it more because my kids are always requesting for good food. I don't know how they did it but they turned something I hate into a passion.

Motherhood has taught me a lot of things. Among these are patience, love, understanding, sacrifice, appreciation, respect and selflessness. The near-death experience of my daughter when she had open-heart surgery also taught me how to be tough and how to pray with faith. As a mother, it taught me how to accept that some things are really just beyond our control and we just have to trust God, hang on, and believe that everything will be ok. I even shaved my head off in my attempt to bargian for my daughter's life. My hair is my fettish, and I gave it up for her. I chose to go bald to save her life.

The doting mother that I am now is because of my kids who taught me that I was capable of giving so much love without expecting anything in return. It is also because of my husband who loves me for who I am who understands that I am not perfect. It is also because of my parents whom I've yet to thank for always being there to guide me in my attempt to explore the wonderful world of parenthood. 

Because of my experiences as a mom, I've grown to love, admire and respect my mom more, now I know what she had to put up with raising 3 smart asses. I only have 2 kids but I feel like giving up already, especially when they get too much to handle. If I give birth to one more kid, that may be the cause of my death in the near future..too much stress is bad for my health.

My Family

Motherhood for me is not always a blissful experience. It is sometimes happy, but peppered with bittersweet moments. It has made me a dynamic and partly schizophrenic person. It has taught me the value of unconditional love. I would like to think that being a mom has made a better person. It has made me feel complete and important. It motivated me to strive and be the best that I can be. Being a mom is an overnight thingy, it is a constant learning experience. Yeah, it is tough and challenging, but I wouldn't have it any other way.